I know it’s been a while since I posted—life has gotten away from me, and it’s all I can do to keep up with the mandatory things. This is not the post I initially wanted to make, but sometimes inspiration takes hold, and you have to go where the muses take you. I’m not disappointed by the journey or the destination.

Over the last few years, I have become oddly interested in watching top 10 lists on YouTube, especially movie/tv show related lists like those posted by WatchMojo.com. I got into this trend because of my kids, but I have no idea when it actually started. A person can find all kinds of movie lists on WatchMojo’s channel and spend hours—if you’re not careful—watching them. (You have been warned!)

The other day, I happened upon the list “Top 10 Movies that are Iconic to 90s Kids” which was actually published in July. I think it was my son who actually turned the video on, but since I enjoy these kinds of videos, I watched it without complaint.

I don’t want to take anything away from WatchMojo’s views or whatever, so I won’t specify the contents of the list in detail other than to say that I agree with the list for the most part (there is only one movie on the list I personally never saw). However, I will say that a remarkable number of those ten movies were ones starring Robin Williams.

I guess it took me time to process the significance of this. I was born in the 80s, but as someone who was a teenager for most of the 90s, I consider the 90s my decade, and I was impressed (I never considered just how many 90s movies the man was actually in). Then yesterday it kind of hit me. I pondered this WatchMojo list—and the truth behind it—and realized that Robin Williams had a huge impact on my life. Monumental, even.

Just looking at his 90s movies—that I was actually exposed to—we have (in release order): Hook, Fern Gully: The Last Rainforest, Aladdin, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jumanji, The Birdcage, Jack, What Dreams May Come, and Patch Adams. There are others, but unfortunately, I have not seen all of the movies of his from this decade—particularly Good Will Hunting—and I have no idea why I never watched them. But look at this list! I mean, aside from Aladdin and probably The Birdcage, I cried during these movies. Big fat tears, either sad or happy (or both) depending on the movie.

And all of these movies taught me something.

• Hook taught me that becoming an adult doesn’t mean you have to stop having fun.
• Fern Gully, aside from its push for people to be environmentally friendly, taught me that a part of growing up is learning from your mistakes and believing that you have the power within yourself to do good things.
• Aladdin taught me that true friends will make personal sacrifices for each other.
• Mrs. Doubtfire taught me that lying and pretending, while they may be the easy path, are not the way to get what you want and will probably end up hurting you more in the long run.
• Jumanji taught me to be careful what you say and to cherish your family, because you never know if that conversation will be your last; also, curiosity can get you into trouble.
• The Birdcage taught me that all families are different and don’t always consist of the people who are related to you by blood and that love comes in all different shapes.
• Jack—oh, Jack—taught me life is an adventure, and no matter who you are or what your limitations might be, you should enjoy it to its fullest.
• What Dreams May Come and Patch Adams are a little more difficult than the others. So many deep issues that are a diversion from the style Williams is known for. To put what these movies taught me into a short sentence or two is difficult, but the best way to summarize it is that we never really know the full impact—alive or dead—that we have on other people’s lives.

Of course, Robin Williams wasn’t the writer of these movies, but anyone who knows anything about him knows that he was an improviser. Even with a script, there are parts of these movies, and the characters played by Williams, that are his. Many of these movies are seen as light-hearted and fun because of him, except perhaps What Dreams May Come, but if you really think about it, all of these movies have something meaningful and deep to portray.

And again, these are only movies from the 90s. Robin Williams delighted audiences with his offbeat humor and his touching and uplifting characters from the 1970s until his heart-breaking and untimely death in the summer of 2014. We lost a legend that day. A legend who shaped my childhood and the childhoods of my children.

I don’t want to start any debates with my next statement, but I choose to believe that Robin Williams is continuing his comedy act wherever it is we go when this life ends, making others laugh with his quirky (and sometimes inappropriate) humor.

I don’t know who originally said this (I may even be paraphrasing badly; let me know if you know the real quote and its originator), but remember, sometimes the biggest smiles hide the deepest pain.

Thank you, Robin Williams, for your smiles, laughs, and voices. The world is a dimmer place without you in it.

Image robin williams by Charles Haynes, available on Flickr, licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0.